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stonishingly, Gary Kayima of Salon is new to C-SM’s “Most Ridiculous Story of the Year” competition. He’s certainly been skewered by me previously, particularly for his Palin as dominitrix piece, which I wrote about here. Well, welcome to the club, Gary.
His Salon column today starts with a defiant headline: Torture works sometimes, but it’s always wrong. Here’s the lead:
We know and have known for years that since 9/11 we have been a nation of torturers. We have also known, in large part, what those tortures consisted of — waterboarding, slapping, sleep deprivation, the withholding of pain medication. With the Obama administration’s release of the four “torture memos,” we have learned about other disgusting practices, such as slamming prisoners into walls and locking them in boxes with insects, and gained further insight into the nauseating legal arguments used by Bush administration lawyers to justify the unjustifiable.
As you can see, the ridiculousness of this story is ingrained deeply from the outset: Kamiya’s unthinking acceptance of a new definition of torture tortures all the careful liberal thinking that he applies to his topic from this paragraph onward. Let me restate it: We know and have known for years that with 9/11 the left redefined torture to suit their purposes, not the true meaning of the word, in order to punish Bush, even if it would cost us lives.
We used to know what torture meant. We were all clear on this simple matter: ripping out fingernails, breaking bones, applying electrical charges to sensitive parts of the body, burning with acid, raping or killing family members in front of the victim. More historically, the rack, drawing and quartering, the Iron Maiden. In other words, stuff that kills, that leaves marks, that changes lives.
The people who carried out these practices did so without much concern for due process, so many of their victims had no business being tortured, whether you believe in the process or are appalled by it. It just came with the territory. “Oops, sorry. We meant to go to your neighbor’s house. Here are your fingers back. Good luck.”
Nothing is so clearly drawn with Kamiya, so he accepts not only waterboarding (aka college hazing in some schools), slapping, sleep deprivation and the withholding of pain medication as torture, and then adds to the definition of the word “disgusting practices, such as slamming prisoners into walls and locking them in boxes with insects.” Nevermind that the walls were flexible and the prisoners wore neck braces. Nevermind that the insects were not poisonous. Kamiya’s got anti-American outrage to fuel, and now he’s set it up by redefining torture to include behaviors like setting the alarm clock for too early.
Once he’s created this skewered and false playing field, he’s ready for his logic games – and this is where it gets really ridiculous. He impresses us by comparing humanist Kantians who would curry to no torture (except, perhaps, those listed by Kamiya, which they probably wouldn’t consider torture) and utilitarian Benthamites, who when confronted with the ticking clock torture – get the information now, or 100 innocent children die – will pick the lesser of two evils and torture the whacko.
Kamiya isn’t buying the Behamites’ line. First, he rejects the ticking clock scenario as something “endlessly depicted in Fox’s TV show ’24,’” but presumably not in real life. Dick Cheney, in his interview with Sean Hannity, used Iyman Faris’ plot to cut the cables of the Brooklyn Bridge as a real-life example of such a scenario, saying waterboarding helped to reveal Iyman’s locale, which led to increased guarding of the bridge, which led to Iyman calling off the whole deal because “the weather is too hot” – too many cops.
It wasn’t exactly the ticking clock, but it was the stopping of a plot before it could be carried out. Iyman reportedly had torches for cutting cable when he was arrested. But don’t bother Kamiya with all that.
But in the real world, the “ticking bomb” situation never arises. It is never the case that we know we can automatically avert mass slaughter by torturing someone. Reality is not that neat. Guilt and knowledge are not established in advance. Those whom we torture may or may not be planning nefarious deeds.
Under those guidelines, the perpetrator would have to be arrested, arraigned, tried and convicted before we could know with certainty that he had information that might merit torture to obtain. Am I missing something here or is that just plain … ridiculous?
Kamiya plows on:
But let us, for the sake of argument, assume that [former Bush intelligence head Michael] Hayden and [former Attorney General Michael] Mukasey are correct, and that torturing Zubaydah led him to give information that resulted in the arrest of KSM and other terrorists. That still would not constitute a “ticking bomb” situation. No one can say whether those captured would have carried out other terrorist attacks. There are too many unknown factors.
Again, before we could pull out teeth or put bamboo under fingernails play loud music or pour water into their mouths, we would have to know their guilt with the certainty of … um … the certainty of … oh yeah! … the certainty we would have if we arrested the terrorist scum leaving the scene of the blown up school and the 100 dead innocent children, with the detonator firmly gripped in his hand. Kamiya has succeeded in a masterful display of liberalism here: It is better to kill innocents than to take a chance at wrongly causing temporary discomfort to an enemy of America.
He goes on to declare that a nation that puts insects in with terrorists who behead people and take down skyscrapers “forfeits any claim to a moral high ground. It becomes no better than those it is fighting.” And he believes it. He’s read the memos, he understands the methods. He lived through 9/11. He knows the fate of Daniel Pearl and other unfortunates who fell into the hands of al-Qaeda.
Yet still, he’s comfortable with his definition of torture and can see no moral difference between our carefully designed, rarely applied and thoroughly supervised non-invasive techniques and the mental wet dreams of KSM and bin Laden.
Worse, he’s willing to let you die for his beliefs.